Making vs buying Halloween Costumes :) I vote for which ever makes you happy!

I love making costumes... I do.. I really, really do!  I think it's a blast.  I enjoy it so much.  However, there are a few times that life just doesn't have it in the cards for me to do so, and you know what... that is okay.  

My kids have always love their costumes made or purchased. 

This years home made made costume is 

Eggs from the Boxtrolls.

Yes, I realize the pants are not box troll wardrobe.. what'chya gonna do?  He loves them.

But.. if you are like me and like to make costumes, I thought I would show off a few of my own home made creations, and I encourage you to do the same, post your pictures in the comments below. Maybe we can all inspire each other!

Yep.. I let him "help" :)

I am Speed!
Made from 2 foam core sheets, some large art quality paper, red and yellow paint, a bit of hot glue but really it's mostly held together by push pins.  I used a child "leash" for the harness part.  It was awesome

Buzz Lightyear complete with glow in the dark paint and light up lights that blink :) Total cost on this was like $12 the blow up ones I could buy was close to like 25 and didn't light up or glow :)  

1 foam core sheet, some paint, a package of post lights from Hobby Lobby.  BTW, we still have this and I will probably never throw it away.  I love it so much! 

Smurfette - I didn't have to use foam core on this one :) It's amazing what you can do with normal clothes and a bit of sewing.
Made from blue clothes from WalMart, some white felt for the skirt and hat, and a white tank top.  Easy Peasy

Like I said before we also have a bunch of ones that we bought, so I'm not hard core (I am pro foam core though :)) one way or another. 

Halloween in my eyes is suppose to be fun but also not cost an arm and a leg.  I never spend more than $20 on a single costume.  However that gets done, is just fine with me :)

Art Stuff #2 - The ART SPACE - The Great Beyond!

First let me clarify one thing.  

Art time does not mean "craft time".  

Crafts are fine, they have their place, they teach following direction very well.  They also are fun to have specific things, for specific seasons etc...

But TRUE ART TIME should be unstructured, gentle but sparse guidance, and freedom to create with out right or wrong.

art¹

ärt/

noun

1. 1.

   the expression or application of human creative skill and imagination, typically in a visual form such as painting or sculpture, producing works to be appreciated primarily for their beauty or emotional power.

In order for this to happen in real life.  I suggest an art area. 

 It does not need to be elaborate.
But, there are a few things to keep in mind.

How to set up an Art Area!

1)The Floor... stuff is going to get on it and... that's okay!  In fact, just expect it and be happy your creative space is so creative.  Your flooring needs to be play dough safe and water safe.  Carpeting might not be your best friend here.  Unless... (helpful hint here) you use an older or cheap  rug.  I'd suggest a something twice as big as your table area.  Or put down a cheap clear shower curtain... and leave it there.  The idea is to have this space available at all times.  When ever the mood strikes it should be available with-out set up required!

2) The Table...  should be sized with the child's size in mind.  Might I suggest you look at Craig's List, garage sales, or just the play ole' internet.  Keep the age of your child in mind.  An older child would do well at a dinning room size (we have an older dinning table in our art area in our basement and it works great).  A smaller child should have a smaller area.  Like a smaller plastic table.

3) Supplies.. Here is what you should have around.

• blank paper (no coloring books - just throw those horrid things away) a ream of copy paper is awesome!
• washable markers (yes even for little ones)
• crayons (if you must... but I have actually found these are the least preferred by all ages)
• glue sticks (yes... it will be OK)
• scissors (use your best judgement on these)
• pipe cleaners (sculptures will be made if items are available)
• stamps (the kind with ink :)
• crayola twist-able color pencils.. these things are awesome!
• jewels - things need bling.. it will be needed! - Google Eyes, feathers, etc.. fall into this catagory
• play dough - of course
• bubble wrap - some very cool things come from bubble wrap
• paint - again, I'd suggest washable 
• decent paint brushes (the ones that come in your water colors are horrible, throw those away)
• PLAY DOUGH
• chalk and if possible chalk board - or just use on colored papers

4) Presentation... some things will need to be in a drawer or tote, or Rubbermaid organization box of your choice.  But, somethings need to be out at all times.  And those items are

• paper - endless supply
• drawing implements (markers, twist able pencils etc..)
• clear surface to create on (don't let this spot get cluttered) - messy is OK.. cluttered is hard to work in.

Anybody can spend a lot of money on organization of art supplies.. but you don't have to.  I've "pinned" several great - cheap ideas that work great.  (just click the link below)
I continue to modify ours - are our supplies come and go and as our ages and interests change.

Vote Mommy For Queen PINTEREST Art Organization Ideas - Cheap!

Here is our progression of Art Area's in our 9 year history.

 Our first attempt at an art area - yes that is an older piano bench - extra stuff was in the lift up part.     

We found a lego table that had a plastic top to it at a garage sale for cheap.  This desk was great!

As you can see it grew with us.  Kaden did some of his best work at this table.

Then we moved it a new house and have an entire area just for our art stuff.  Occasionally I will pull out the easel ... but notice the easy clean floors (Yep - that was a must).   Our "office" is first up.  It's the corner of the room that my youngest does her work at while I work from home.  Not much messy stuff happens here but all supplies are always available to her.  And the desk was made for us by their Grandpa :)  Thanks Papa Sanmann :)

Our upstairs office area for the kids :)
that's clear contact paper on the wall - sticky side out.. she puts things up there that are very important to her.

This is where they can do what ever they want.  Notice the Lego's - yeah.. it's a great place for that too.
That's an old dinning room table - again bought from a garage sale - the top has some scuffs but that's OK for an art table.

Supplies available to them.  Trust me everything I told you to have - is in there... and more.
I keep random things and they always use them.

If you only take away 2 things from this entire post.. 

let those 2 things be....

• LET GO of your need to have everything be clean all the time  - at least in one corner - use a closet where you can shut the door if you have too.  Or an unfinished basement area that they can go to where they won't get in trouble and have 24 hour access to.  If you find they never go there... it's because it's not in an accessible area.  MOVE IT!
• LET THEM make with out an end expectation of what it is suppose to be, or look like.  Let them make what they want to - truly be creative with things they can have fun with! 

Next UP!

We will talk more about the emotional power as we discuss Sensory Integration and Toddlers.  How we used art to get us through that time in my son's life.

GIVE A WAY WARNING!!!!!!!!! Knock Knock - Who's there - Elephants!

We are giving away a BABY ELEPHANT!  

Well, a Bobee Inc. Baby Elephant! 

Keep reading for your chance to win 1 of 3!

There is something about Elephants!  They are gentle giants, they are great moms, they have families that stick together forever.  I can't think of a better animal image to put in my home!

The love of elephants go way back.... I'm sure growing up you remember this precious moment in the movie Dumbo.  As a child you thought it was just a song, but as a mom... I can't watch it without crying.  

One of the newest trend in nursery decor is swinging back into the pachyderm themed sets.  And I have a cute one to share with you. 

In fact I'm giving away 3... Yes 3 different sets, a grey, blue, and pink set.  This product is  brought to you from Bobee.  I have one of their diaper wall caddies and loved it!  

Now you can decorate anything in your home with these cute elephant decals.  

Oh yeah.. they also have adorable giraffes.  I'm pretty sure the elephant and giraffe are the two cutest animals out there. 

BoBeeDecals.com

Elephant Decals on Amazon

 Enter by clicking HERE!

Here is how I used them at my house :) 

This was my thought process.  My daughter is now 4, so she is into a bigger girl bedroom and not really a nursery any more.  I could have lined them up by our measuring door where we take our kids height measurement the first and last day of school every year.  And I really gave that a lot of thought.  However, I really wanted to do something that would show you how versatile these little guys are.  And when challenging my kids in art, I always say.... challenge your perspective.  So, I asked myself, where would be unexpected, but yet be seen everyday, at every eye level, and bring smiles to my family.  I think I found the perfect spot.  

 She is giving them all names.  Those two are sisters :)

 We travel our stairs a lot in my household!  This part of our stairway is always eye level no matter your height as you climb to the second level.  My children, think this is great.  In fact my middle child came home from school and said "I really like the elephants mom, it's like they are jumping down the stairs".  They are traveling along our house with us, bring smiles as they go.  People visiting never, ever over look their placement.

 I have learned as an artist to place things in spots were people aren't desensitized to their placement.  People pay attention to these little guys.

They might be small in size, but mighty in visual impact.

Plus - added bonus the gray go perfectly with my love of monochromatic grays in my home. That makes me happy :)  I adore grey!

Elephant fun facts

• Only one mammal can’t jump — the elephant.
• Elephants have the longest pregnancy of all the animals. It takes a female 22 months from conception to give birth.
• Elephants are highly sensitive and caring animals. if a baby elephant complains, the entire family will rumble and go over to touch and caress it. Elephants express grief, compassion, self-awareness, altruism and play.

What's grey, beautiful and wears glass slippers? 

Cinderelephant! 

What do you call an elephant that flies? 

A jumbo jet! 

Why don't elephants like playing cards in the jungle?

Because of all the cheetahs! 

source: http://www.jokes4us.com/animaljokes/elephantjokes.html

Why you should NOT teach your child ART! (Art stuff edition #1)

If any of you know me personally you are probably thinking one of 2 things... 

1) I obviously made a proof-reading mistake and didn't really mean to write that.  Which to your credit... happens a lot.
2)  I have lost my ever art loving mind!  Considering, I have a double major from a Kansas City Art Institute, teach art in the private sector, and truly believe in my heart that art is fundamental to all aspects of a well rounded child.

So... why would I title this post "Why you should NOT teach your child ART".

It's because a child does not need to be "taught" art, they are already some of the best artist ever!  It's in their DNA, they live and breath art.  Children have created some of the best things I have ever seen in my life.  It's us adults that just screw it up and get in their way.  Some of the most famous and talented artists ever, have known this.

"Every child is an artist. The problem is how to remain an artist once we grow up."Pablo Picasso

Now, you are probably saying "you are not making any sense at all".  Well.. here is what I mean in the most orderly way I can think to present it.  I'll keep it simple.

Top 3 things you should not ever say or do to a child artist.....

1) Don't ever show them how to draw something!  Don't do it!  Because chances are you can't draw it any better than they can and by teaching them a tree is drawn like this .......

you have shut down any attempt to discover what a tree looks like to them... what wonderful things they could see - with their detailed eyes.. with their imagination that see fairies in the leaves, or the fantastic reflections of the dew, or the texture of the bark.  And really... not all tree's look like this, but somebody taught you to draw a tree like this and so you pass down this horrible habit to your child and therefor shut down their own discovering process.

2) "Oh wow.... this is beautiful".  That's fine if you know that specifically it was meant to be beautiful.  But... something most adults don't understand the point of art is not to be beautiful!  Art is meant to be interesting, emotional, a discovery, a way to communicate to others.  In the earliest forms it literally is a note to others about what that kid is thinking about.  And if that kid is really mad, sad, or scared, and they are trying to tell you that... your beautiful reaction is inappropriate and shuts down their line of communication.   For example.. maybe they are trying to tell you why they aren't sleeping well.  Seen Monsters INC.?

image from http://tillsontitan.hubpages.com/hub/Have-You-Really-Seen-Monsters-Inc

3) Don't ever say.. "I can't draw a straight line or a stick person - I'm horrible at art".  What you said to them is "anything you think is good really isn't because it's not perfect and therefor I should not try and just use the excuse, I'm not good at art".  Does that work with any other subject?  I mean really, would it be ok to tell your child "I'm sorry I'm can't multiply 2x2 or do arstro physics so I'm just not going to try any math at all, I'm not good at math".  If you kid said that to a teacher at school, your reaction would be that only practice, leaning, and understanding helps you get better.  Don't ever give up at such an early age on any subject.  But, I have lost count how many elementary school age kids have told me "I'm not good at art".  What?  Oh.. are you a World Series Player? Cause if you aren't at that level by age 8 you should just drop out of little league.. because really.. What's the point? You obviously have zero talent at baseball.

3 things you SHOULD say instead!

1)  Let's start with what we see and break it down into smaller pieces.  

Example how to talk a child through drawing a tree.

• Where you do want to start top, bottom, or middle?
• What shape is that most like?  Square, circle, pyramid, wiggly oval?
• Is that part the same color?  Is there any part that is brighter, lighter, darker, fuzzy, or smoother than the other part?
• Can you use your extra super power eyes and see anything little on there you need to add or is it all complete?
• What part do you want to do next? 
• Is that part smaller, larger, closer, farther, over, under, darker, lighter etc.. that the first part.  
• Continue on with that type of questioning.
• Is it all done, is there anything else it needs to look complete, or interesting?  Anything you can think of to add to it to make it your own?

This way the drawing is constructing it's self, your child isn't focused on the skills of their artistic ability but rather trusting what their eyes are seeing and trusting that.  And NOT trusting what their brain thinks  it should look it, which is probably wrong.

2) "Wow, this has a story to it, can you tell me what that story is".  This doesn't need a lot of explanation.  Just don't patronize your child.  All art has a story, that's a fact.  The story can be why it was made, how it was made, the story of who made it, when they made it, who the made it for or with.  You will get so much more out of your child's art work with this question.

3) "I'll try my best and have fun doing it".  Because, that's what matters at this age.  You, they, everybody will get better if they just don't give up, or stop trying.  So what if it's not the best ever, do you really think a 4 year old cares?  No, they don't, they care if you participate.



What I'm trying to say is you don't have to TEACH IT... They already KNOW IT!

Fashion trends of the SAHM - Laugh a little, and then buy a maxi skirt!

Ok.. so we have all heard of the mom jeans.  You know the ones!  They are super high waist'ed and make your butt look really, really, really long!  OH.. yeah... elastic top is even better!

image from

 http://crafturday.com/mom-jeans-know-want/

But.... hey with that new "baby bump" that Jennifer Gardner is bring back we can't really sport the low cut either for fear of the muffin top.  Nobody want's to see that.

Image found on 

http://www.savvysassymoms.com/blog/mom-jeans-and-muffin-tops-just-say-no/

So.. we get creative right ladies.  As a mom I no longer have the time, or will power to iron my own clothes.  And since sweats have that "I didn't' even try" appeal to them we start looking around.  What are all the other mom's wearing?  Answer!  Yoga pants and Maxi skirts!

At this point I would like to refer you to this web-site of 

HOW NOT TO WEAT YOGA PANTS...

I'll wait while you laugh, go put on your own pants, check your butt out in the mirror, take a picture send it to your friend, ask them if it looks okay, then you come on back when you think you can....  I'll wait!  It's okay.. go look.

when-yoga-pants-go-wrong - click here!

Now we move on to the more safe side of SAHM clothing choices..... Maxi Skirts.  I'll be honest.. this is a fashion trend that's been around a year or so..but I am totally jumping in.  Why you ask? 

1) Because in the summer I can hid my unshaven legs for a quick run to the store.

2) Because it's summer and I'm having a fat day.

3) Because it's winter and I'm having a fat day.

4) Because it matches all my shirts. At least my black, grey, and white ones do.

5) Because it's winter and I can put legging on under it and be very warm, and cute!

6) Because it doesn't need ironing, ever....

7) Because I can wear it with flip flops  

8) Because I don't have to worry about my muffin top, my whale tail, my long butt, or my boy shorts line, it's the perfect SAHM outfit ever!

9) Because I slept in it last night (yes.. I use them as night gowns sometimes) and didn't have time to change before I dropped of the kids at school.

Now, may we all bow our heads and say a little prayer they always stay in fashion, that this not quite 70's free spirit look, but not quite bohemian look, not as bad as the Amish (no offense intended), not too old, not too young looks stays around for a while!  Amen

image found

http://randomthoughtsfromastayathomemom.blogspot.com/2013/04/sunday-deals-and-steals.html

Mommy Hacks - Vehicle edition - Be THAT Mom!

Every mother out there has seen THAT "other" mom that seems to have it all together.  You know, what I'm talking about and if you don't, then you are either not a mom or live under a rock, or you are THAT mom.

I've gathered a few ideas from a group of talented mommies out there, I can't lay claim to all of these.  But, you can bet your cute lip gloss I'm going to steal them as my own and use them daily from now on.  Feel free to do the same.

Mommy Hacks Vehicle edition!

1) Note taking in the car - keep a dry erase marker in your glove compartment for a quick scribble on the window.  Yes... write on the window.  Your  not going to loose that piece of in the endless abyss of your minivan, or purse, or diaper bag, or pockets etc...  And you won't forget about it, because every time you enter or exit you will see it.  Wipes off with a sleeve.

2) Keep a cute, (best if) non-melt-able lip gloss also in the glove compartment for the times your not dressed yet, but have to run that lunch box that was left in the car into the school.
You might be sporting slippers and flannel pants, but at least you don't have that morning scary face on.
Lip gloss and sunglasses can go along way.. trust me...

3) You never out grow the need for a good package of baby wipes.  Ever!  There is always a need for baby wipes.

4) A bag of extra clothes (updated for that season and your kids' sizes) for each  kid.  Yes.. we all know the need for an extra outfit for the baby or the potty training kid but you still need things like this sometimes.  Every time we switch from Day light savings time and back I always go thru my car.  I updated a shirt, pants, socks, underwear, light jacket etc for each kid.  Usually they are the ones that were handed down, or a good buy on the clearance rack for $0.50.  The things you normally don't dress in daily, but they are mighty handy.  I've had a goat rub his poopy bottom on my kid's pants at a petting zoo, I've had a nose bleed at a soccer game and needed an extra shirt, I've needed extra underwear because "things" happen even to kids to are over potty training.  I've had a kid playing in a dirt pile getting filthy mcnasty and then fall need heat stitches.  I'm sure I would have been turned into authorities if it hadn't been for those extra clothes (and a tub of baby wipes).  Soggy socks from mud puddles before church.... I could go on.... you get the drift.

5) Keep a little cosmetic bag of those "feminine products" around.  For the obvious reasons of course, but also I've heard that pads are great first aid items in an emergency you might come up on.  There's a plastic barrier to keep the blood from your hands and absorbs a lot blood if the wound is bad.  They are handy for many reasons.  And did you know a tampon could save your life in the wild... well... read this :)

/survival-tampon/
First_Aid_Kits/Sanitary-Napkins-have-More-than-One-Use

6) The thing that has saved many a trips... an extra package of AA Batteries for the DVD headphones.  Yes... there is never a good place to buy them when they go out in the middle of a western Kansas Trip.  You will thank me for this one.  Keep them in there at all times.

7) Keep a cute jean jacket for yourself in your car.  For many reasons... refer back to #2, if you find the need for #5 and need to tie something around your waist that isn't obvious and finally because a cute jean jacket will go with almost any outfit and  make you look trendy.  Right...?!?  Please tell me we aren't past this phase of fashion yet... I depend on this way too much!

photo from http://blog.repeatpossessions.com/new-arrivals/back-to-school-with-jacky-it-jean-jacket

doing my Pin-terst duty as a Mommy Blogger..... non-conforming Burlap wreath for the PICKY and Obsessive!

Because it's in the contract you sign when you sign up for a blog address.  If you are a mommy blogger, you must complete at least one Pin-terst craft once a month.  Yep...I'm pretty sure it's legally binding, and since I am not wanting to aspire to Martah Stewart's time in jail I will fulfill my craft duty.

However.. I do have to say this!  As a person with a "higher" education in the Arts (art history and studio art painting and printmaking), from an high flue-ten- hoyt'y toyt'y - private school who only teaches artist.. not crafters this is a hard transition for me.

 Never ask your friend who is an artist to paint your bird house because "they are just so crafty".  You are likely to get a paint brush thrown like a dart at your head. 

 Artist do not like to be compared to crafters. However, I must admit my opportunity to create "art" has been damped a lot by children who like to play in my toxic paints and my free time is limited.  I hope that this changes next year when I can have a few hours while all 3 kids are at school, but until that blessed time....

I have caved into the Pin-terest craft pressures of the SAHM crowd.

So, here is my first.  I wanted a burlap wreath.  But... I have weird hang-ups about bows and fake flowers... so my options were limited.  I also believe the chevron thing is adorable and cute but short lived especially since it's been around a while.

 I also like to revolve against the norm (part of the artist chromosomes I think) so no bows, weird flowers,  or chevron. 

Also,  I'm not a huge fan of brown I much prefer black (again it's a revolt against Johnson County KS beige thing).  But.. I like the burlap wreath look.  Here is what I came up with!

Luckily I just randomly walked in to Hobby Lobby on the week their wreath supplies were 40% off. So.. score!  The burlap that has the different typography design on it I found in the sewing area.. it was on a bolt and bought by the yard.  I had to make my own strips, and used hot glue to keep the sides from fraying.  But, it was worth it, to have some design I liked.

Instead of flowers, I used peacock feathers.  I loved the colors and I think it add some "classiness" and "sassyness".

The wording (Family) I found in the wall hanging department, it was black but after it was all assembled I decided it needed to have have some color to stand out a bit.  A little bit of spray paint to the rescue.
Here are a sequence of pictures in the order it was constructed.

I used wire to hold the word on to the frame of the wreath.

There you go.   My first Pin-terest project fulfilled.  I will do something once a month, or at least that's the goal.

Here is my list of the top 10 things that are changing in KC since the Royals made the play-offs!

First of all.... WOW!!!  How awesome are the Royals doing!
I've lived in KC since 1998.  I came up here for College at the Kansas City Art Institute.  Growing up we were not a family that watched sports.  We didn't follow any football, basketball or baseball.  I had no idea what a foul ball was, what was the difference between a strike or a ball.  I played a little tennis in H.S. and that was as far as my sports knowledge went.

 I was an artist.. we aren't known for our sports talent.

I married... a sexy sports addict.  I now run a support group for wives married to sports nuts.  Just Joking, he really isn't that bad, but his family can be.  I say that will love and I know if they read this they will take that as a compliment.  It didn't matter if it was college, H.S., or professional - Baseball, Football or Holy COW the Chicago Bulls!!!!!!!

They would watch a bunch of senior citizen Chinese women play ping pong if it was on ESPN.  

I  have gradually become a local sports fan.  We used to have KSU football season tickets.. that is before we had kids.  Then we started watching the Chiefs on T.V. during Sunday.  And by that I mean Matt would watch it while I napped on the couch enjoying the fact the 2 boys were also napping.  When the boys started T-Ball we started introducing them to the Royals.  I tried to like them, but I'm going to be honest here.. I found Baseball extremely boring.  However, I do detest those kind of fans that jump on the band wagon when things are good and jump when when there bad.  So, I bought me a Royal's Shirt, and showed my support.  I did the same for the Chiefs!  On Sunday I wore red on baseball days I wore blue.  If they were doing especially well i'd paint my finger nails in supportive colors and do my duty of asking how the game was going as I did something else.

Being a supportive fan was more an accessory for me than a true lifestyle.

These past few weeks, I  have seen a change in our whole town.  And yes, even in me!

Here is my list of the top 10 things that are changing in KC since the Royals made the play-offs!

1) Instead of finding Royal's shirts on sale in Oct, they are actually more!$!

2a) It's okay to wear the same 2 shirts every other day if they are Royal's shirts.
2b) you now have to do laundry every day to keep your clothes clean, since you are now wearing them on a rotation.

3) Coffee sales, and caffeine deliveries have spiked in all areas!  People are taking those 5 hour wake up shots at 11:00 pm in inning 10!  Parents are giving their kids Coke before school because they were at the game the night before and teachers are seriously considering bring back afternoon naps school wide.

4) You see random groups of people... all decked out in Royal's Gear at random places because somebody on Twitter said the Fan Bus might make a stop there.  This happens all over town. Personally experienced this Friday at the grocery store.  Yes, we took a picture!  Yes, my daughter was scared to death of Slugger.

5) If you have DVR'd the game, and haven't seen it yet.. you have to remove yourself from all technology, and society.  That includes Face Book, Twitter, the Local news, any group of people, and yes.. sometimes your family.  I refer to this commercial. But, make the change from soccer to Royal's.

Man trying not to hear game score only to have his daughter spoil it

6)  Your elementary school has wear "Chiefs Red" Friday and most of the school comes in Royals Blue instead.  Yep.. true story! Even the teachers :)

7) Craig's list is full of SAHM mommies selling homemade hair bows, baby oneies, cake pops, scrapbook pre-made pages, and yes even jewelry (shameless plug here for myself).

8) People who usually only accessories with sports are actually watching and talking sports.  For example... this person writing this post :)  I actually care now!

9) The police department is actually charting crime stats and making pleas for lower crime during game times.  Now... that's a city devoted to their team when even the criminals take a time out of their activities to watch the game.  Seriously.. take a look at this....
kc-police-claim-royals-playoff-run-is-actually-preventing-crime

10) If you have tickets.. you now have like 100 new friends that want to buy you a drink at the game.. just let them tag along... "help a buddy out"!  Baseball nerd no longer... now a Major Stud!

11) Just because this is awesome.... BABIES!!!! Yes.. BABIES being born, being names and babies of players.....
pitcher-greg-holland-back-in-la-after-birth-of-son

a-special-night-for-a-royal-baby-epic-wild-card-rally-sends-royals-fan-into-labor/

Royals, you have lite a blue light across our town and I thank you for your hard work.  I personally love to see the comradery that you have inspired through out our area.  We all respect how hard this must be to keep going through all the extra innings and we thank you for giving us something to cheer for!  Faith... it can carry a town a long way.  And we have faith in you!

My one Fake Boob - It's Pink October - Breast Cancer Awareness!

No I did not have cancer.  I'll just put that out there.. but for 2 months... there was a possibility and it was crazy scary.

In 2006 I was 28 years old and we found out we were expecting our 2nd child (surprise)... they found a tumor in my left breast.  Honestly.. they were surprised that they just now noticed it.  My normal size of a B was a D.  Up to that point in time, we all assumed it was just my bodies way of dealing with the pregnancy and breastfeeding of my first child who was now 10 months old.  Boy were we wrong.

I was told, not to worry.  They will be back in the room in a minute after they make a call.  10 mins. later they had me set up with an ultrasound the next day and an appointment with the leading breast cancer surgeon the day after.  I took all this in stride.. however when I found out that surgeon was usually a 6 month wait to even get a consult the realization of what this could be was not lost on me.

Now.. I take a time out of my story to inform you of my super power!  Yes.. I have super power.  It's called Denial.  I have it in copious amounts, and it comes in very handy at times.

When the surgeon took at look at my files, looked me in the eyes and said "I'm sure it's fine, but we need to wait until your 2nd trimester until we attempt surgery".  I was barely 6 weeks along, so I just set it all aside.  I did.. I didn't loose any sleep over this, I actually thought about it very little.  What was my choice, I couldn't do anything at this point so I just keep going on.  I wore diagonal stripped shirts because I thought it created in illusion that would hide the size difference.  I padded the other one with those silicone things.  I hid it.  Well I tried.. you can see below it was hard to hide.

                                             this is me at my first son's Birthday Party
                                                          a few weeks before removal

 I'm told much later by my husband that he wasn't handling this very well.  But, that is his story to tell and someday maybe he will.

The 2nd day of my 2nd trimester - I walked in the hospital to have my tumor removed. 
I should also say... it was this day we found out we were having a boy!  Yep... the ultra sound after surgery to make sure the baby was waking up ok we found out this wonderful news, and that is what I choose to remember most about that day. 

Upon waking up from the surgery, the Dr. showed me the tumor.  It was 10 cm long, 6 cm wide, and 4 cm deep.  It was about the size of a chicken breast - slightly smaller than my hand.  In tumor land this is a giant.  She was sure she got it all, she took all the breast tissue I had and they would send it off to be analyzed.  Bad news, since she was trying not to damage any more milk ducts that were still decent (not very many were still working) and realizing I would want to breast feed my 2nd she didn't do any kind of cosmetic work on my remaining skin.

**** let me paint you a picture.  I had a size D boob.. they took all the mass and tissue out of it... just image the left over - deflated - stretched out - 80 year old woman looking thing that was remaining.  It wasn't pretty... in fact... it hung 3 inches below my other side and now I could roll it up like a tube sock and tuck it into my bra.  And I did just that for 3 years.

I called it my Salvador Dali Breast.

(image from Wikipedia)

Thankfully.. and truly... I will never be able to thank God enough for answering my prayers of not having cancer - the tumor was benign.  Which was a shock to the Dr. at my follow up... she said "Honestly I didn't think I would be able to tell you that after the surgery".  That is when it all set in or me and I finally cried.  Thankful for my denial up to that point!  Officially I had a giant Fibro-adenoma. (http://www.cancer.org/healthy/findcancerearly/womenshealth/non-cancerousbreastconditions/non-cancerous-breast-conditions-fibroadenomas).

Because it was benign... I didn't qualified for breast reconstruction per my insurance.  For 3 years I fought this, and finally I got an OK through some little tiny loop hole!  And I took it.  Again, I was so blessed to have another leading surgeon of KU Breast Cancer Center take on my surgery and she did great.  I finally have 2 matching boobies!  Yea!!!!  Yes, my left one has about 4 large scars it's been cut, gutted, re-shaped, and stitched back together in about 3 different directions but it's the same size.  And I am thankful!  I can wear swimming suits, I can wear tank tops, I donated all my diagonal stripped shirts.  I can wear normal bra's again! 

I threw away the collection I had gathered of multi colored sports bras in different styles.. I even had my "dressy" ones for church.  I now hate sports bra's!  I went on a bra shopping spree!!!! Of course that is after the 6 month recovery of the reconstruction surgery.  If you ever think that a breast reconstruction is an easy surgery you are wrong.  It was more painful for me that all my birthing experiences combined (and epidurals don't really work well on my due to my scoliosis).  So.. I mean it really hurt.  The nerve pain was like fire.. and it stayed for 4 weeks after the surgery.  I had to wear a pump of medicine that was inserted into my skin - even in the shower and bed.  I couldn't lift for months.. and I had a 3 month old baby girl at this time, so I depended so much on family.  Again... totally blessed to have a Mother, Mother in Law, and cousin that came and stayed with me and were my arms to my 3 very small kids.

I'm not going to put myself in the same category as breast cancer survivors.  I didn't have cancer, but I got a small taste of their treatment and struggles and it's not easy.  I didn't experience chemo or radiation and I am beyond words about how lucky I feel about that. 

I now try to have a sense of humor about my fake boob.  Even though it was "made" to match the other one, to be what it was before all this tumor stuff.. it's "new".. and "perky" and  yes fake.

 The scars remind me that I am strong, that I was touched by skilled hands and by God's grace!

I see the wonderful and touching art photographs of cancer survivors that are truly amazing, and those women who boldly show their traumatized bodies to the world are so strong.  I pray that they feel strong.  I also pray that they feel feminine.  Having a part of your body, no matter that part sectioned off as sick and removed is not a good feeling.  Having your body turn against you in a such a scary way is well... terrifying.

Rally around these women!  Each woman will have their own story, their own way of dealing with their experiences.  I personally love what P.ink is doing to make something beautiful out of situations like this. https://www.facebook.com/PersonalInk
Maybe someday when my nerves in that area aren't super duper on high alert, I'll be brave enough to have an awesome image put on there.  I would love that!

 I've had about 4 other tumors the size of marbles removed over the years between 2005-present.  One on my head, 2 on my back, and one on the bottom part of the right breast.  So.. I go for yearly screenings, mammograms and ultrasounds.

  I always do it in October because that's when I remember to make the appointments. 

Funny story... last year I was recovering from a simple fever virus and made my appointment.  I fainted right in the middle of the mammogram.  I awoke to about half the office standing over my uncovered top half taking my pulse and blood pressure.  So, I have learned to not be overly sensitive about the whole strangers seeing my boobs.  My husband is so pleased! :)  I say this with sarcasm, because now, I will flash people just to make him laugh.  I'm glad he isn't too over sensitive about it either.  A good laugh can help a lot.

I urge you to get checked, get a mammogram, and remember that even something small can become a big issue so don't take any chances or take your time about  dealing with things.

 If you share my super power of denial, don't let it flex it's muscles on this topic.